Monday, May 30, 2016

5 of the best (and worst) Sherlock Jokes


5 of the best (and worst) Sherlock jokes

Camping trips, word play and a joke about pavements… we round up some of the best Sherlock-themed jokes on the internet


5 of the best (and worst) Sherlock jokes

Written By
What better way to get in the mood for a new series of Sherlock than a few jokes? Series three lands on our screens tomorrow night. But before Benedict Cumberbatch and Martin Freeman get back to the altogether more serious business of how Sherlock is actually still alive, here’s a bit of silliness. 
Add your own jokes in the comment section at the end… 

1. Camping
Sherlock Holmes and Dr Watson went on a camping trip. After a good meal and a bottle of wine they lay down for the night, and went to sleep. Some hours later, Holmes awoke and nudged his faithful friend.
"Watson, look up at the sky and tell me what you see." 
Watson replied, "I see millions and millions of stars." 
"What does that tell you?" Watson pondered for a minute. 
"Astronomically, it tells me that there are millions of galaxies and potentially billions of planets. Astrologically, I observe that Saturn is in Leo. Horologically, I deduce that the time is approximately a quarter past three. Theologically, I can see that God is all powerful and that we are small and insignificant. Meteorologically, I suspect that we will have a beautiful day tomorrow. What does it tell you?” 
Holmes was silent for a minute, then spoke. "Watson, someone has stolen our tent!" 
Via jokes4us

2. Paintings
One day, Sherlock Holmes and Doctor Watson were doing their usual investigative business, when they uncovered an unusual painting.
At first glance, it looked like a picture of normal oak tree, in the middle of a wilderness, but if one looked closer, one could see that it was a remarkable painting. The tree trunk was actually made of fire, and its branches were made of ice, clouds and earth.
"What is it, Holmes?" asked Watson in awe.
"It's an Element tree, my dear Watson," replied Holmes.
Via angelfire

3. Chasing pavements
Q: Did you hear that Sherlock made a song called “The Pavement”?
A: Yeah, it was a hit! 
Via wattpad

4. Looking for limestone
Sherlock Holmes and Dr Watson are busy with yet another complicated case. Suddenly, Holmes seizes a chunk of blood-spattered limestone from the ground.
"What is it, Holmes?" asks Watson, eagerly.
Holmes turns and replies, gravely, "It's sedimentary, my dear Watson.”
via angelfire 

http://www.radiotimes.com/news/2013-12-31/5-of-the-best-and-worst-sherlock-jokes

New Sherlock Holmes tale: The Howling Death available at Amazon now for 99 cents.




Sherlock Holmes must stop the murderous rampage of a slasher before more innocent people die! The Howling Death 99 cents at Amazon!

Sherlock Holmes Movie: The Scarlett Claw


Starring Basil Rathbone, the villain of Robin Hood, another excellent film he starred in. And Nigel Green as the bumbling Watson. Classic film and story!

Friday, May 20, 2016

Sherlock Holmes and the Case of the Westminster Abbey Ghost. He had to save two souls from eternal death! Available now at Amazon for 99 cents!


The Case of the Westminster Abbey Ghost
 
For over a decade a ghost has haunted the Abbey. Now it’s up to Sherlock Holmes to solve the case of its death before more tragedy can occur.
 
A ghost haunts the Westminster Abbey. Someone died tragically. Sherlock is tasked to solve the crime that caused the death of the person haunting the Abbey. Revelations will come that are both startling and fantastic.

Available now at Amazon for 99 cents!

Wednesday, May 18, 2016

New Sherlock Holmes story: Curse of the Bloodstone of Amandor. Now available on Amazon for 99 cents.

Lady Amandor is related to the Queen of Britain, but she has vanished. Sherlock Holmes and Watson must rush to save her before the Curse of the Bloodstone of Amandor strikes again.



The mystery is how? The answer is death. Sherlock Holmes: Curse of the Bloodstone of Amandor.  99 cents at Amazon.

Friday, May 13, 2016

Deals back on! 99 cents for this huge volume of Sherlock Holmes stories. But only for today. 99 cents at Amazon!

Today only! 

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Sit back and feast your eyes and imagination with the thrill of the hunt, the taste of pleasure as you adventure alongside Sherlock Holmes and Doctor Watson in a series of adventures that will haunt you, amuse you, and leave you gasping for more.

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Sunday, May 8, 2016

Sherlock Holmes novella. The Black Tower. Dark forces are on the move. Sherlock and his Baker Street Brotherhood must stop them!


The Black  Tower. 

Sherlock and Watson are joined by their Brotherhood of Baker Street in a desperate mission to stop dark forces from assaulting the kingdom and killing the Queen.

They will battle demons and shadows, and madmen who know only the joy of power and destruction.

Available now at Amazon for $1.99.

Sunday, May 1, 2016

May 1st Edition of The Baker Street Universe newspaper is now online. Cool facts, articles, videos and images about sci-fi, Sherlock Holmes and science.

Sherlock Holmes is only one corner of my writing universe. Check out these other spots too!


If you like this blog, you're also going to like ImagineNation.

Chock full of images, videos, artwork, movies, animation and other cool things.

ImagineNation!

And for a double serving of pleasure, be sure to check out my author site. You don't think I post all my stories here, do you? I don't. Lots of new ones there as well and surprises you'll probably enjoy.

www.johnpirillo.com

Movie: Sherlock Holmes Returns with Spanish Subs